Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day in the United States. Each year, over half a million dreams are shattered. Out of 3.3 million born alive, some 30,000 die during the first 28 days. Another 39,000 babies are still born. Miscarriage occurs in fifteen to twenty percent of pregnancies, while ectopic pregnancy occurs in one percent.

More than 25,000 children are stillborn in the United States every year leaving mothers, entire families and communities devastated. Estimates of the rate of occurrence of stillbirth make it at least as common as autism.

Stillbirth is not an intractable problem. Greater research would likely significantly reduce its incidence, but good research requires good data. H.R. 5979: Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act is under consideration by Congress. This proposed bill would standardize stillbirth investigation and diagnosis, thus providing more data for the needed research. Better research means fewer children born still.

On October 15th, remember the thousands of unfinished children lost and the families who remain to grieve them. Honor them by taking action. Let's help pass H.R. 5979.

My Sleeping Angel

I absolutely love taking pictures of Hailey when she's asleep. I don't know what it is but it's just so precious to watch her as she sleeps!

A Story of Life and Loss

My heart breaks as I read Stacy's blog. She gave birth to her beautiful son today. After 16 minutes, he passed away. Her husband and her prepared for this day. Instead of planning a shower, decorating a nursery, or picking out a "coming home" outfit, she planned her unborn son's funeral and memorial service. I type this, as I am holding Hailey. I sobbed as I read the sad news of baby Isaac and held Hailey a little tighter. I looked at her and cried. Sad that Stacy would not experience this with Isaac and thankful that I am able to with Hailey. I could not imagine what she is going through. To carry her son to full term to only say goodbye. I bet those were the best 16 minutes of her life. I don't think she will ever forget how it felt and he will have a place in her heart forever. She is one of the strongest people I "know". My heart breaks for her and I wish her strength through this devastating time.



If you would like to read Stacy's story,

http://sgirl79.blogspot.com/

I hate Reflux

Hailey has reflux, I am not sure if I talked about this much before. It's kinda like acid reflux adults get but a little different. Every baby has a form of it (spit ups) just some are worse than others. Reflux is very common in preemies and Hailey has the luxury of being one of them.

Her reflux is the reason for her being on the apnea monitor. Reflux makes her food back up her esophagus which pushes on her diaphragm and slows her heart rate (This is called a Brady). It can be very painful.

This past weekend it really seemed to be acting up. She was crying throughout feedings and after feedings. Spitting up a lot more than normal. No Bradys (thank God). Choking more often and arching her back in pain although hungry and wanting to eat just not having a great time with it.

I decided to call her pedi yesterday just to see what I can do to help her. I tried keeping her upright and elevated 20-30 minutes after eating, elevating her mattresses (put a phone book underneath), burping her more often when eating, and giving her a pacifier (when she would actually take it) after she eats because it helps push her food back down in her tummy where it belongs. The pedi wanted her to come in.

So we went in today. She now weighs 8lb 6oz! Obviously the frequent spitting up wasn't effecting her that much! The doctor doesn't think it's getting worse, it could have been what I ate the day I pumped the milk she drank (I am so far ahead with my milk supply I don't remember what I ate the day she's eating). or just a random bad reflux day which can happen. Overall, she's not worried because Hailey is still gaining weight rapidly and looks great when examined. And of course, as it works out, Hailey seems to be doing much better today...figures. But still great.

One bit of shocking news is that her doctor plans to possibly have Hailey on the apnea monitor until she's 6 months old! SERIOUSLY? It hasn't even gone off. She wasn't put on it because she has apnea episodes. Strange. I don't know. Whatever. While the monitor can be annoying, it is a great piece of mind. We don't really have to worry about SIDS because this monitor alarms if she were to stop breathing for more than 20 seconds. Having reflux, putting her on her side to sleep can help so having her hooked up to the monitor allows us to do that. Because of SIDS, side sleeping is a huge no-no.

It just sucks that she gets to spend the 1st 6 months of her life hooked up to monitors with those sticky leads suck to her skin and wires hanging out the bottom of her clothes. Plus when she goes to daycare, she'll still be on it so I don't know if this will effect her acceptance. We have a lady in mind who will watch her 2 days a week. She runs an at home daycare out of her home. Having an apnea monitor is a lot of responsibility to take on and I wouldn't blame her if she didn't want to deal with it while also caring after other kids too. Especially since she doesn't charge that much compared to other home daycare so add that to taking on a preemie with an apnea monitor...may not be worth it for her. We'll see.

My job allows me to be off 2 days during the week, which will cover the 2 days she would have to be in daycare but then I work all weekend long and there is not 1 day in which Randy and I will have off together. Not to mention I don't really want to be with this company for long after I go back. I am ready to move on to a different company, but that also means working a Mon-Fri job. I am not going back into retail HR, I want to get away from it because it doesn't pay well.

Okay now I feel like I am rambling! Hailey's next appointment is on October 20th for her 2 month check up. Also that same night, we are taking professional pictures of Hailey with the same photographer who did my wedding. Can't wait!!

Our Spoiled Little Girl

Here's a few pictures of Hailey. You must excuse the quality of them, they were taken with my cell phone. The last photo was with my cell's flash and it gave it this blue coloring. But it's such a cute photo of her I had to post it!!

Sleeping on Daddy
I am happy with my bunny bib.

Hailey's 6 week check up

Hailey is now 8lbs and 20.5 inches long!! She's a growing girl! Doctor says she's doing great! She goes back in 2 weeks for her 2 month check up (wow, she's going to be 2 months old in 2 weeks!!).

Who does Hailey look like?

If you click on the picture you can see it in full size!

Hailey's cute sleep habit

No doubt, whenever I check on Hailey while she sleeps, she always sleeps like this!! Arms always above her head or by her face! Too cute!

Pretty in Pink

Hailey's First Doctor's Appointment

We got in a little early (was supposed to be Thursday). She weighs 7lb 2ozs! And is now 19.25 inches! She's a growing girl. We basically just got advice. We really like her pediatrician. She's great! She said Hailey looks good and seems to be doing very well! Her next appointment is in 10 days!

Hailey's Online Birth Announcement

Here is the online birth announcement I created. I will also be sending out a different one in the mail soon!!

Mom's mini photo shoot

My mini photo shoot! I am no professional but these are adorable!! =)

Hailey is home!

Hailey came home last night! We are so excited. She is on the apnea monitor and so far no alarms! I have to admit it does give us a little piece of mind!! She slept great last night. she never woke us up but we did wake her for feeding time! She seems very comfortable at home! She has become just a great eater! Such a relief since eating is what kept her in the NICU for so long. She hasn't taken to breast feeding just yet. She is used to the bottle nipple and doesn't see my breast as a food source. I am going to keep at it but at least she is eating my breast milk from the bottle right now!

The neonatalogist (her doctor at the NICU) recommended that we limit visitors (actually he said no visitors but to limit them since parents usually do not listen) but to definitely not have school age visitors at this time. School just started and there are a lot of germs going around plus RSV season starts in October. We were bummed about this since Hailey has so many cousins waiting to meet her but if she were to come down with RSV, it can be deadly and she would end up in the hospital again. We do not want to risk this at all. Also anyone who is sick, getting over being sick or thinks they are getting sick should wait until they are 100% before visiting! I am not sure how long the school age kids restriction needs to be. Hailey has her first pediatrician appointment next week so we will talk to her then. I think I read of a RSV vaccine. We will see! I'll keep you all posted!

Update on me!

I saw my OB today for my follow up appointment. We discussed possible reasons for my water breaking early. As you all know, I had excess fluid and Hailey was big for her age. This causes my uterus to be larger than my actual gestation which could have caused the rupture. Other causes could be that I produce thin membranes which caused the rupture or she was just ready to come out for various medical reasons. He told me I have a 40% chance of another premature delivery with my next pregnancy.

If with my 2nd pregnancy he notices I am going back down the same path of producing excess fluid I will have to have more restrictions regarding my activity level. So that's really about it. He was amazed at how much I swelled during my pregnancy and how all of my weight gain was due to water retention. baby, fluid, placenta, etc. According to his scale I had gained 35lbs during pregnancy and have lost 40lbs since birth. Holy water retention!! I guess that's what happens when my feet double in size from the swelling! HA!

Hailey is coming home!! .....With some conditions!

Hailey is coming home! The sleep study (which is called a pneumogram I found out not necogram...hey I was close!) machine is not in still. The hospital informed our insurance since this is the only reason she hasn't been released yet. They decided that she is to be sent home on an apnea monitor until the pneumogram is administered. Once the pneumogram machine is in she is to go back for the test.

The apnea monitor only alarms when she stops breathing and is different from the monitors she's on now. If she passes the pneumogram then she does not have to remain on the monitor and can go home as usual. If she fails then she will have to continue to be on the apnea monitor at home until her pediatrician decides she's ready to be off of it. So cross your fingers she passes! The nurses seem to think she will.

This is so great that she gets to come home and wait instead of waiting at the hospital! We are thrilled. If the apnea monitor is delivered tonight then we are to stay overnight at the hospital with her in a room to learn how to use it and we will go home in the morning, If the apnea monitor comes tomorrow morning then we are to stay at the hospital until about 4pm then we go home.